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11 signs you’re with the person you should marry

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Do men have biological clocks? Yes, they do. A man can feel the need

to grow up and have a family, especially when he finds a woman who

inspires those feelings in him. The problem is, how can you be sure

the match is a good one?

You'd think the positive signs in a date would be obvious, but with

all the excitement, the most important clues can be overlooked. What

makes for a great date may not be all you need for a great

relationship. This checklist of positive signs will help you evaluate

your date in a realistic manner. If you get a lot of these positives,

this date might be a good choice for marriage.

1. He has a sense of humor.

Of all the characteristics that are essential for getting through life

successfully a sense of humor has to be in the top ten. Using jokes to

avoid taking responsibility for one's behavior can prevent you from

solving problems. The sense of humor you're looking for is the

generous, positive kind that makes life more fun and the tough times

easier. If your date can make your laugh and lift your spirits that

talent may help you through some future difficulties.

2. He cares about what you think.

A date who asks for and listens to your opinions and feelings, and

better yet, who remembers what you say and builds on it later, and who

responds with empathy, sincerity and caring is someone you can

communicate with and therefore, more likely to be able to form a

partnership with you. If you pay attention, you can quickly notice the

difference between the appearance of caring and real caring. If your

relationship is successful you'll have years of talking to each other

so find someone who is interesting to talk to and also interested in

talking with you. Your date should be able to carry on an interesting

discussion on a variety of topics and at least show interest, even if

the topic is not something he or she is familiar with.

3. He has an opinion, too.

A truly good conversationalist not only listens to your words and

responds but also has ideas and opinions. Your date should not

hesitate to disagree with you or to bring up new topics.

4. He can work things out with you.

Recent research shows that the single most important quality that

determines whether a relationship can succeed is how well the couple

solves problems. If you have a disagreement while dating welcome it as

an opportunity to see how well the two of work it out together. If you

can discuss your differences without becoming defensive or sarcastic,

and you can listen to each other and work together toward a solution,

your relationship has an excellent chance.

5. He accepts who you are.

You and your date are unique, special and individual and need to be

able to understand each other and accept that you'll perceive things

very differently. Even when you and your date see things differently

you should be able to agree to disagree. Remember, the security and

comfort in your relationship will come from where you and your partner

are similar, and the excitement and growth in the relationship are

generated from your differences. Different interests, opinions,

attitudes and ideas will keep things fresh and alive between you. If

your date does not become defensive or threatened by your differences,

you can be interesting to each other for a long time.

6. He is open.

The whole point of dating is to get to know each other. While you both

may want to take a little time before disclosing too much your date

should be comfortable talking about him or herself and it should not

be like pulling teeth to find out what you need to know.

7. He has a life with a job, friends, family relationships and interests.

A date who has a full, interesting life you would want to be a part of

is more likely to be a healthy, balanced person. While it's important

to have some relaxation time and time to meditate or think a life that

includes a good career, hobbies or sports, community service and

friends and/or family is reassurance that your date is motivated,

focused and able to relate.

8. He seeks out knowledge.

Your date doesn't need to be a member of Mensa or a mathematical

genius but look for enough intelligence that you can respect and

admire each other. There are several kinds of intelligence, from

school learning to independent education by reading, working,

traveling and life experiences. An airhead who looks good and may be

fun to play with will not keep you interested for long. A date who is

not interested in learning and growing intellectually may not be able

to keep up over the long haul.

9. His modesty, humility and ego are balanced.

As you learn about this new person you're dating, observe his or her

character and personality for signs of a balanced sense of self. If

your date can keep success and failure in perspective, admit personal

shortcomings, and rise above disappointments and losses, he or she

does have a balanced personality and the kind of resilience that can

travel through life's highs and lows and keep it all in perspective.

10. He is emotionally mature.

While it's fun and charming to be able to be childlike when in a

playful mood, it's essential to be an adult whenever necessary. A date

who is responsible, self-regulating, emotionally responsive,

motivated, and in control of his or her impulses is capable of being a

supportive, fully participating partner no matter what joys and

sorrows, successes and failures you may face in the course of a

lifetime.

11. He has a healthy history of relationships.

Of course, if both of you are dating again, your relationship history

will probably not be perfect. What counts is whether your date has

learned from the problems, confronted his or her own weaknesses and

shortcomings and grown as a result of the setbacks. If your date is

willing to talk openly about his or her past relationships and can

explain what went wrong and how he or she is learning to correct the

problems, the difficulties in past relationships can be an asset

rather than a liability. If your date expresses a willingness to seek

counseling in the event that problems should occur, score that in his

or her favor.

Remember, a smart date will be watching for the same characteristics

in you. To do well in a relationship, learn to be the partner you

would like to be.

[Credit: Huffingtonpost]

Kofi Oppong Kyekyeku

I am a Ghanaian Broadcast Journalist/Writer who has an interest in General News, Sports, Entertainment, Health, Lifestyle and many more.

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